Pina Colada Cake + 5 Boozy Cake Links!

 

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Not bad, she thought, regarding her reflection in the full length mirror of a small hotel room she shared with her husband and three children.   The navy blue, white polka dot, full piece bathing suit fresh off the rack from Macy’s hugged her hips and small breasts, her smooth, pale Nordic skin almost pearlescent in the bright, Bahamian light.  As she turned to grab her ten dollar, drugstore sunglasses and scratchy hotel towel, she noticed her profile, pronounced in the warm light. She tenderly rubbed the soft space between her hip bones, a slight bulge, her body forever three months pregnant, abdominal muscles long gone; this space was once the home of her three children.

[Babies too large for her small frame and yet she willed herself to carry them.  And when they tore her apart, departing her body and entering the world, she felt nothing but relief.  Love would come…later.]

The family trip to the Grand Bahama was her idea.  He, her half present husband, the worst kind, acquiesced.  Anything to stop her nagging.  Anything to keep her questions at bay.  His soul’s sin would be revealed many years later.  An affair: yes.  But his real sin: insecurity.

[ A soul with a hole so cavernous no drink or woman could fill.]

So, when she found herself at the poolside bar, admiring the bartender’s dark brown eyes, golden skin, silvery hair and stainless white teeth, was she appalled by her desire for him?  No.  Like driving a car with a low tire, the air slowly, but surely escaping, something was amiss in her marriage.  This she she felt in her milky skin, her blue veins, her raging claret blood…her bones. 

She ordered a pina colada.  The bartender smiled, got to work.  She watched him: tan, capable hands adding ice, fresh pineapple, pineapple juice, coconut cream and rum to a blender; a bit of sweat twinkled on his brow and above his hairless lip in the mid-day sun.  

[Briefly, she thought of his lips on hers. This fantasy quickly dissipated when she noticed a gorgeous, buxom, blonde saddling up to the bar. She is who he wants.  Or, so she thought.]  

When he handed her the pina colda, complete now with a fresh pineapple wedge and maraschino cherry, he also gave her his number on a white cocktail napkin.  Ha!  Cheeks flush and gitty with surprise, she paid him.  After taking a long drink, she smiled, stood, turned and walked away. The cocktail napkin remained on the bar where he placed it, her sweating pina colada sitting directly on top of the scribbled numbers.  Nothing said, no door left ajar.  Condensation from glass would make the numbers bleed into each other.  And this memory of being seen again, fresh, would bleed into other memories of unexplored men handing her a drink.

She found her family sitting by the pool, her handsome husband with a beer in has hand chatting with their strawberry-haired, freckled faced boy.  His favorite, his only.  The girls, both husky, pretty tomboys, were huddled together on a chaise lounge, dripping pool water.  The older girl had found forty dollars in the hot-tub.  Such luck, she thought!  As the girl held the wet twenties overhead, victorious, her sister decided since they were a family who shared, they should share everything, including this serendipitous loot.  They laughed, not yet knowing, too much and not enough would be shared in the decades to come.

Pina Colada Cake

A moist cake studded with fresh pineapple and covered in a sweet rum glaze

recipe slightly adapted from Smitten Kitchen

serves 8

Ingredients for cake:

2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking powder

3/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

4 ounces of coconut oil, at room temperature

1/4 cup light brown sugar

2 large eggs, at room temperature

1 cup cream of coconut (This is not coconut milk.  I found it in the Mexican food section of our local grocery store.) Shake well before measuring.

1/2 cup finely chopped pineapple, strained, juice reserved (from a can in juice not syrup)

Ingredients to brush over cake:

2 tablespoons reserved pineapple juice

Ingredients for glaze:

1 cup confectioners’ sugar

pinch of kosher salt

1 tablespoon milk

1 tablespoon dark rum

Directions:

Pre-heat your oven to 350F.  Butter a 9-inch round cake pan and line with a circle of parchment paper.  Lightly butter and flour parchment paper.  Tap  out excess flour.  Set aside.

Grab a medium bowl and whisk together flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt.  Set aside.  Using a stand mixer with a paddle attachment, beat butter and coconut oil at medium speed until pale and fluffy, about 3-5 minutes.  Add the eggs, one at a time, scraping down the sides of the bowl once or twice.  Add rum.  Next, add cream of coconut.  The batter will look curdled.  Don’t worry! It will come back together once you add the flour.

Add half of dry ingredients, scraping down the bowl with a spatula, before adding the other half.  Add the remaining dry ingredients and mix until just incorporated.  Using a rubber spatula, fold in chopped pineapple.

The batter will be thick.  Spread it evenly into your prepared pan.  Bake until golden brown or when a toothpick inserted in the middle of the cake comes out clean, 35-40 minutes.  Cool in pan, on wire rack for about 10 minutes.  Run a knife around the edge of the pan and invert the cake onto the wire rack.  Remove parchment paper.

While the cake is still hot, brush it with reserved pineapple juice.

While cake is cooling, make glaze.  Grab a small bowl and add powdered sugar and salt.  Stir in milk and rum.  Stir until completely smooth.  Pour glaze into middle of cake and spread to the edges with an offset spatula or butter knife.  Serve immediately or refrigerate for 20 minutes until glaze is set.  Cake is best the day it is made.  Leftovers, stored in an air-tight container, at room temperature, will last for 2 days.  Enjoy!

5 Boozy Cake Links!

Still feel the winter chill in your neck of the woods? Warm yourself up with Food & Wine’s Maple-Bourbon Banana Pudding Cake.  I’m guessing it will hit the spot.

I love a good mojito.  Olive’s mojito cake is on my must make immediately list.  Yum!

Don’t wait until next St. Patty’s day to make Spoon Fork Bacon’s spicy chocolate stout cake with simple peanut butter frosting.  This combo sounds delicious!

Bubba loves a good margarita and never turns down a piece of cake.  I think it’s time to make him Pastry Affair’s boozy margarita cake.

My mom loves all things coconut so this Mother’s Day I may just make her Beth Cake’s triple coconut rum cake.  Coconut + rum equals a tropical vacation in a bite!

 

Key Lime Curd Coconut Bars + 5 Key Lime Links!

3:46 AM glows green.  My sleep swollen eyes want more sleep, but my mind has other plans.  Should I just get up? Read? Finish my key lime curd blog post?  Bake muffins? Fill them with the leftover curd?  Maybe I’ll go for a run.  Maybe not.  I turnover and watch my husband: his profile outlined by the ambient light in our bedroom, the chest I rest my weary head on nightly heaves up and down, his handsome face is relaxed, peaceful.  I want to kiss the tiny, fine lines around his eyes.  What are you dreaming about J?  Have you escaped to someplace far away?  I feel such tenderness for him.

Snore. Snore.  Ugh.  A good shove should do it.  And hate.  [Marriage is complicated in the dead of night. First light, we start again.  Love renewed…mostly.]  I turnover, face the blank wall and curl up like a newborn fresh out of the womb.  Tonight, I will chase sleep like a coy lover.  J seduced her a couple of kids ago.  Good for him.

Eyes heavy again.  I’m drifting.  Little voice: “Mama? My belly hurts.”

5:30 am and the day has begun.

Key Lime Curd Coconut Bars

Creamy key lime curd paired with a whole wheat coconut crust and drizzled with melted white chocolate is a dessert you should commit to memory!

Makes 12 bars

Key lime curd recipe adapted from Food 52 lemon curd

Coconut crust adapted from Bob’s Red Mill Coconut Lemon Bars

Bars inspired by Taste of Home Easy Lemon Curd Bars

Ingredients for key lime curd:

1/2 cup key lime juice

3 large eggs

1 large egg yolk

3/4 cup sugar

pinch of kosher salt

1 stick + 6 tablespoons unsalted butter

1/4 white chocolate chips, melted (for topping)

1/2 cup unsweetened, flaked coconut (for topping)

Directions for curd:

Pour two inches of water into a saucepan and bring to a simmer over medium heat.  Grab a stainless steel or oven proof glass bowl large enough so it will sit in the rim of saucepan without touching the water.

Using that bowl, whisk together the key lime juice, eggs, egg yolk, sugar and salt.  *Do not let the eggs and sugar sit together.  The sugar will start to cook the yolks resulting in a granular texture.*  Place the bowl over the saucepan and whisk constantly until the mixture becomes very thick, about 10-12 minutes or when it registers 180F on a candy thermometer.  You know it is ready when your whisk leaves a trail in the curd.

Remove bowl and allow to cool slightly (5 minutes or so), stirring occasionally.  While the curd is cooling, cut the butter into 1 tablespoon pieces.  Add the butter 1 piece at a time and whisk until completely incorporated.  Alternatively, you could use a blender or immersion blender to incorporate the butter.  The curd will be a slightly pale yellow and super thick.  If you are not making the bars right away, store the curd in an air-tight container for up to 5 days.  Bring to room temperature before using.

Ingredients for Coconut Crust:

1/2 cup unsweetened flaked coconut

1 cup white whole wheat flour

1/4 powdered sugar

1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted

Directions:

Preheat your oven to 350F.  Spray a 8×8 baking pan and line with parchment paper.  Set aside.

Spread 1/2 cup of coconut flakes on a small baking sheet and bake until the coconut is golden brown, about 5-6 minutes.  Cool.

Using a medium bowl mix together toasted coconut, flour, powdered sugar and butter until a dough forms.  Spread the dough into the prepared baking pan and press evenly, covering the bottom of the pan.  Bake crust until golden brown, about 20 minutes.  Let cool.

Once the crust is cool, pour the key lime curd on top and spread evenly.  Sprinkle with a 1/2 cup of coconut flakes.  Bake until the curd is set and the coconut flakes are golden brown, about 30 minutes.  Cool to room temperature on a wire rack.  Once cool, drizzle with melted white chocolate.  Loosely cover with plastic wrap and chill in the refrigerator for about 2 hours or overnight.  Cut into 12 bars when ready to serve.  Bars will last in an air-tight container for two days.  Enjoy!

5 Key Lime Links!

Looking to combine your love of cheesecake with your love of key limes?  The Merry Gourmet has a recipe for key lime cheesecake that will unite both loves into one delicious dessert.

Nostalgic, handheld desserts are the best kind of sweet treat.  Head to Martha Stewart for her key lime whoopie pie recipe.  Who doesn’t love a whoopie pie?

Key lime doughnuts? Yes, please! A Zesty Bite has the recipe for you.

Part cake, part custard; Foodness Gracious has a recipe for key lime magic cake that is sure to win the hearts of all!

Foodess’ no bake whipped key lime pie is on must make summer dessert list.  I’m drooling…and dreaming of summer.